What I Want
by Shattered Apocalypse
Summary: I want to see her bright, dazzling smile... It always seems to put me in a better mood. She spreads her cheerfulness around all the time. Like a wildfire she engulfs everyone, only not in flame, but in happiness. Natsume POV.
1. I Want Her

**Warning: **Short (pretty much a drabble, only longer). Somewhat lusty. The repetition of the words "I want" might get annoying. Oh, and Natsume's a bit of a stalker here, forgive me.

**Disclaimer: **I disclaim.

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><p><strong><span>What I Want<span>**

_Natsume_

_I suppose being straight forward is always the easiest way when it comes to feelings. - Shattered Apocalypse_

I want to have her.

The thought of me inside her never leaves. I'm not usually lustful, but it seems she is always an exception to everything I try to stand for. I ignore girls more than half of the time, yet it seems that no matter how hard I try, I can never fully ignore her. She grasps at my mind and permanently stays.

I want to ravish* her body, her mind, her heart, her soul. I want to etch myself into her, to see my engravings on her soft milky skin. I can't stop such sickening thoughts.

I want to kiss her in the rain... To hold her in my arms. I always wondered when I had become such a romantic... Or when I had begun to think in such a disastrous style. I might have been a bit of a trouble child but I never did anything tremendously serious... like fall in love.

I want to see her bright, dazzling smile... It always seems to put me in a better mood. She spreads her cheerfulness around all the time. Like a wildfire she engulfs everyone, only not in flame, but in happiness.

I want to kiss her rosy lips and hear her moan. ...I feel like vomiting whenever I have such feelings of want. It's repulsive to have such needs for a person that won't look at you as anything more than a friend.

I want to feel her breath against my neck. I'm a sick person to want her; even if there was a chance... I don't, and will never, deserve her...

I want to run my hand through her beautiful pale-brown hair. It's tempting and I can't help but want to touch it, to kiss it.

I want to get lost in those mesmerizing eyes of amber. So large and innocent, with ever changing emotion. Simply gorgeous and nothing less.

I want to touch her, feel her, love her endlessly. They're repelling thoughts I try to keep at bay as much as I can, yet they continue haunt my mind day and night.

I want to hold her small, elegant hand and hug her petite figure. I'd die before I would ever admit it. I shouldn't act like a lovesick fool.

I don't want to let her go...

But I'm stuck with this unrequited love and it's forever going to stay this way. She loves him, not me.

Nonetheless, I want her.

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><p>*In this case he means to 'seize' her everything... not rape her. If you get my meaning.<p>

And there you have it: a very short one-shot with absolutely no plot behind it. I might make a second chapter from Mikan's POV if I get a lot of reviews and if people really want it.

Tell me if you liked it!


	2. I Want Him

Huh. So I have decided to grace you with Mikan's point of view. Hopefully it's not shitty, considering it's so... short...

The warnings are the same as the previous, with the addition that, well, the story has obviously become AU. And OOC. A little less (or maybe more?) lusty than Natsume's POV.

Thank you, everyone that liked, reviewed... and all of that, I love people!

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><p><strong><span>What I Want<span>**

_Mikan_

_Have you ever noticed that there's always some lie in a person's honesty? - Shattered Apocalypse_

You can't compare him to a normal human being. He is still as intriguing... as simply _captivating,_ as he was when I first met him.

I suppose that's why I want him.

The idea that _I _could be by his side, that _I _could be his lover, sends something akin to pleasurable shivers down my back. It sets me on edge, knowing how I feel about him.

I want to seize him for myself. It's strange of me to think in such a way, considering we are only close friends, but I nonetheless do.

I want to hold him. He gives the most fulfilling hugs; delicate yet strong, as if he is afraid to break me but still chooses to support me and protect me.

I want to kiss him... To feel him on my lips, to _taste _his essence. It's revolting, yes, but such blasphemous ideas won't leave my head. He's always just... _there._

I want to see his smile. It's quite rare... like the most beautiful ancient jewel, kept sacred for eternity. When I see his smiling face, it's never a façade. So real, so beautiful... The mysterious glint in his eyes when he sees me make a fool of myself... the accent put on his mouthwatering cheekbones... He has no dimples, yet he looks cute, _ravishing _even, as he just smiles there, whether it be unbeknownst to all or not.

I want him to kiss every inch of my body. I dream of it, sometimes wondering what kind of expression he'd put on when he'd see me unclothed.

I want to hear him panting whilst sending butterfly kisses across my skin... so pale compared to his... It's stupid to think this way, but I must, for these thoughts are as far as I will ever get to _being _with him.

I want to run my fingers through his stunning charcoal black hair... the same hair that blows elegantly with the wind... the same hair that is neither too long nor too short.

I want to stare into those pools of blood red for the rest of my life. His eyes are most fascinating. ...If only they would set themselves on me, and me only.

I want to simply _be _with him. A selfish idea, considering my current predicament.

But I will continue to lie to myself, despite my usually honest nature, by giving my vows to a red-headed* devil that I shall eternally _pretend _to love.

I will though, proceed to adore, to _want_, the attractive man that stole my heart so long ago.

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><p>*Reo Mori, I mean. Does he even have red hair, or is that just me? Oh, well.<p>

And here is the Mikan POV. Um, thanks, the four that originally reviewed the first chapter, I appreciate it =)


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